Crazy week.. more updates and lots of pics when life slows down.

When did life lose the magic?

Light a pumpkin spice candle, plug in the LED Christmas lights, turn up some music, and chill.  My name means Christmas for a reason.  It is, after all, my December.

On Thursday I got together with the other engineering grad girls and decorated cookies (SO much fun, and way relaxing).  One of my cookies won the "best decorated" award and I brought it home on a plate, along with a couple others to munch on before the holidays.  Well, this morning I woke up and found the plate of cookies on the floor with teeth marks in the plastic wrap... and my favorite cookie was a room away, the frosting chewed off and smeared into the carpet.  Somehow my cat knew which cookie I liked most, and destroyed it, leaving the rest untouched.........

I saw something yesterday that you would have liked.  Someone had the license plate RBLSCUM and a giant "Long live the empire" Star Wars sticker on their car.. too funny.

The hardest part will be unlearning when I see things I want to tell you about.

Life is a bit like the climate models I work with.  If you narrow down your point of view to a day, or week, or month, what you discover is mostly noise, and you become lost in the nonsense and meaninglessness.  But, if you extend your point of view and see beyond to years.. or lifetimes.. there, the true meaning exists.

Watched the first part of Planet Earth this afternoon.. way relaxing, and some of it is hilarious, like this segment on birds of paradise.  If you haven't seen it yet, it's worth the 2 minutes......

When I need a break from studying, I browse youtube.. here are 3 completely random things everyone should see.


Christian the lion

I saw the full story on this once on Animal Planet, it's really incredible.  Wish they'd picked a less cheesy song for the vid though.



Carl Sagan explains the 4th dimension

If you have 7 minutes to kill and you want your mind blown, this is completely worth the watch.



And to lighten things up..

Britney Spears Womanizer parody

Don't want an Aragorn, I want a young Gandalf the Grey  *giggle*

I did my best; I have no regrets. We shall see if it was good enough.

Random thoughts.

Realizing that you have limits is humbling; realizing that you've reached them is terrifying.

The weather lately has been cloudy, in stark contrast to the cobalt-blue skies of Arizona that I'm used to. I've never equated sunny weather with happiness (I'm pretty fond of storms); rather, to me sunny weather represents clarity of purpose (which could be described as happiness itself, don't you think?). The overcast skies these days seem to mirror my state of mind.

One final down. Much love to all my friends who are going through the same hell right now (nail those nursing exams Bre!)

Finals are kicking my butt. Today I spent 9 hours straight in the library.. and the guys I was studying with told me to get up because I hadn't moved the whole time haha. I'm like dude, you should see me when I'm gaming, this is nothing ~

I have a new Nikko cartoon to post when I find some time, probably after Monday when my last final is over with.

Otherwise, here's a quick update on life.....

AZ people are mostly dicks (maybe just the guys. or maybe guys in general.), it's too damn cold here at night (gets down to 40, brrrr!), and being alone is the worst around the holidays.

I got home today and went to check on the cats' Le Bistro machine............. to find it missing. Gone. All that was left was the detachable food dish that the machine dumps into. WTF.

I start the search for the 2 foot tall, 10 lb machine, wondering if my cats had been practicing telekinesis in my absence. Finally I found it, apparently dragged two rooms away, buried under a blanket by a cat that clearly wanted to hide the evidence. This is what I get having a brilliant cat with a food addiction. Maybe I need to get him hooked on something else. Like crack. At least that's something I can hide from him.

Maybe.

-------------------------------------------------

I want to thank my friends for being the coolest people on the planet and making me feel special on my birthday, even though I'm a million miles from all of you. Thank you <3

What I bought myself for my birthday...



.... peace of mind. This morning at 7am as Caspian was stepping on my face and blaring his 80 decibel meows, I realized that the only reason he abuses me is because he thinks his human needs constant reminding to provide him with food. So, I thought, what if a machine feeds him instead? Naturally I googled it and found this little gem for the ridiculous price of $69.99 (plus, it needs 3 D batteries, not included, unless you want to go to their website and spend another $20 for the charger and base.. as if!). It dispenses a preset amount of food up to 3 times a day at times you set. The look on his face when it spat out food was priceless.. maybe when he realizes that it does this at the same time every day, he won't need to complain about food anymore, and his human can finally get some sleep.

If this works, it was worth every penny.

Do you ever wake up not knowing where you are? That brief second when you're opening your eyes, and you feel like you're back in some other place or time. Guess it's a side effect of having lived in so many places.


The memory of waking up in a hotel room is somehow more comforting to me than waking up in many of the places I've lived. Maybe because being in a hotel room meant I was on an adventure, and if there's any place that's ever felt like home, it's somewhere new.

Enjoying the last two nights of my luxuriously long break (big thanks to my advisor for making me take one, I needed it). I had an amazing week, probably the most fun I've had in a long time. Now to chill out, relax, and enjoy some good music. (Damn you John Mayer and your new album for making us love pop, again..)

Apple vs. apple juice: on nutrition


Apple juice is just as good as the real thing, right? But every time you drink your juice, you're missing out on tons of fiber, not to mention the act of chewing is good for your teeth and gums and increases serotonin production (which can make you feel fuller and gives a sense of well being).. all that for one little apple. Nom~

Happy Thanksgiving~

Actual conversation.

...
Him: You won't go to lunch with me because you think you'll get fat?
Me: No, I just have to get some work done.
Him: I think that's why all skinny girls are crazy- you don't eat enough.
Me: ..you know you just called me crazy, right?
Him: Well it's a good thing, because I wouldn't like you anymore if you were fat.
Me: ...
Him: I think God hates us. All of the cool girls are fat, and all of the skinny girls are crazy.
Me: Uhh.. I'm gonna go now.
...

After telling him later that he was being kind of a jerk, this was his response:
"Oh. But I'm starting to think girls like jerks. I was planning on being a jerk to the next string of girls I meet."


Talking to girls. Ur doin it rong.

This is me, like every weekend.....

I used to go for walks really late at night, when the sound of my footsteps were my only company and my breath came out misty in the cool air. I'd walk down our streets to the edge of town and find a dark place to sit to look at the stars. Sometimes, I'd wish that I would meet someone else out there, anyone, and we could sit and talk. Sometimes I'd imagine that someone else was out there like me, somewhere, thinking the same thing.

Pain is just the weakness leaving the body.

Sometimes life picks its path for you, and you are left a spectator, swept away in the current. Now I take my first uncertain steps toward the shore, eyes and mind open, unafraid. To whatever end may come.
Let your waves crash down on me and take me away.

Latest news from the geek front! Now they have street-level 360 degree interactive views of different places. Check out the beautiful Hawaii beachfronts....
It's based on the same design as two of the coolest things in the history of the universe, Google Earth and Google Sky. Go have fun and be amazed.

teh zoom..

hi2u galaxy

I've been burning down, burning way too fast
You can see right through me now

-Johnny's new song Cellophane. <3 it.

Studying hard is how you get through undergrad. Not so with grad school. Not when teachers assign take-home midterms and the answers to the questions can be found in papers that the teacher has written (so unless you know how to find the papers, you're left solving in two weeks what took the teacher 10 years to derive). Grad school is about resourcefulness, Google skills, and who you know.

I'd like to take a moment to thank all the awesome people I've met this semester, without whom I would be doing way worse in my classes. You guys rock.

Last night I hosted our SWE grad girls happy hour (go women engineers, woo!) at a local bar, and as always, I have a funny story to tell..

We got complimentary valet parking, so as we were leaving I handed the guy doing valet my ticket.. and saw a pad of engineering paper on his table with a few problems on it.

Me: Getting homework done?
Him: Yeah.. just for my thermodynamics class..
Me: Oh, cool. Hey, that's a refrigeration cycle.
Him: :O

We ended up chatting for a bit, then he asked for my number. How is it that even guys I meet off campus are engineers? Am I doomed to date engineers forever? Sigh...

I did what I set out to do. I said all I wanted to say. Somehow, I knew that I was needed, and I was there for you. Our worlds met for a brief time once again. Now you'll be alright, and so will I.
Farewell again, my friend. If you need me I'll be there.

/facepalm of the day...

If someone picks you a flower, don't tell them it's poisonous. They will wonder why you know so much about poisonous plants (eat too many as a kid?) and the kind gesture will be crushed. ._.

Feeling down lately, so here are a few websites that always make me laugh.


The cat-toast device: It's gonna save us all.

The lol-cat Bible: I calz her "whoa man", k cuz she wuz in ur chest taken ur ribs. Srsly.

Creationist propaganda: I still have no idea if this is serious or not.. either someone put a lot of work into a spoof, or they really mean it when they are going dinosoar hunting in Africa and say things like this:

"Besides supplies that are common to all animal capture expeditions, we have determined that we need the following special equipment:

• Metallic pterosaur effigies based on Biblical designs (for herding into traps.)
• Frankincense smoker (to disorientate the animals for capture.)"

Earlier today I cut up cucumber slices and put them over my eyes while laying down (feels great btw!), and my cat came over and started sniffing my face.. next thing I know, he's trying to bite the cucumber off my eyes -.-;; So I broke it into pieces and fed it to him.. he thought it was the greatest treat ever. Now I can add cucumber to the list of strange things my cat will eat (already on that list is broccoli and dish sponges.. but he won't eat shrimp. wtf?)

Now to try and sleep for real. Thanks for trying to take care of me.. after relying on yourself for so long, it's tough to realize how much you need people sometimes.

LULZ UR DEEPS JUST GOT PWND BY A GURL

That is all.

/facepalm

My brief venture into the world of dating is, for the time being, over. At least I know a little better what it is I'm looking for. That is the point of dating anyway.. isn't it? haha.

"Someone like you, and all you know, and how you speak..."

Happy Halloween everyone! Get out there and have fun!

<3, DNC Cat

While I was jogging today I was listening to a song with a piano intro, and I remembered something from an old Simpsons episode. Lisa is listening to a violinist play, and a man complains about the music; Lisa replies, "you have to listen to the notes she's not playing." I noticed that the song was more beautiful because I found myself filling in notes in my head that were missing in the playing: the remaining notes in a chord, or resolving a line with the key the song is written in. Knowing more about music now and being able to pick out patterns, I could hear notes that weren't there, and the song was that much better for hinting at the notes and letting you fill in the rest. Just like that line in the episode I saw many years ago. It stuck with me because I never understood it. Until now.

Art works the same way. Drawings are just concepts of reality. An artist uses a line, or a shade, or a color, to imply something real, and to evoke thought and feeling. Graphite on paper is suddenly so much more. Yet the artist uses only lines and shades, colors and shapes. The viewer sees something more by taking what is implied and filling in the rest with their mind.

Why is something even more beautiful when it's incomplete, when the details are implied but not stated, when we are urged to fill in the rest? I liken this concept to the first moments of falling in love. You know just enough about the other person to intrigue you. You see their outline; the rest is still a mystery. And yet, you fill in the gaps in your head, and what you fill in is perfection; because what you imagine will always be what you wish to see. The person becomes more than what they are, and the result is beautiful: defined in truth, refined in imagination.

Art, music, love, science, life... when the walls separating these come down, we transcend.

Are you stuck on what to dress up as for Halloween?

You can be Domo!

Sex, Germs, and Worms

The grad student mailing list gets info for presentations happening on campus. This one caught my eye for the silly title.. but how can you go wrong with the pic of the nomming lemur?? Too cute. Reminds me of our friends at EATM (remember James? good times k!)


It got chilly today- only hit 65. Beautiful cuddle weather. Alas...

So many things to tell you. So many years I missed. You wanted to be just like me; do you still, after all these years? Or did your dreams vanish when I did?
The person you've grown into, the person I've become.. someday, sister, we will meet again, for the first time.

Another funny story.

I was in the car with a group of Mormon friends who were all singing along to the radio. "Brown-Eyed Girl" came on, and they all loved the song so they started singing it really loud. Well, it got to the line "making love in the green grass," and the entire car went from singing to *dead* silence. It was like synchronized prudeness. Bahahahahaa~

Highlight of the evening: as we were walking back from the club, a guy passed by and oogled some girls in front of us, saying "hey girrrrrrl" as he spun around to stare... then kept spinning and fell right over a bush into the street. LOLtastic drunken stupid guys make me smile.

You would think that this would be easy after all these years. Reminds me of this cartoon...

Thankfully none of the guys are quite that odd. Engineers are pretty cool actually. I still think a friend was right though when he said he couldn't date other engineers because he needs balance in his life. Sure, I can talk to these guys all day about classes and research and the Stokes paradox. But dating someone with a completely different perspective of life keeps me open and interested. The dates this weekend are mostly for fun, but I'll still keep an eye out for the musician/track athlete of my dreams (thanks Laura.. haha).

Meteor shower tonight at 1 am (any time zone). You know I'll be out there~

Johnny Cooper - Follow release party at Billy Bob's Texas

A very nice compilation of the big Dallas show my ex's band played a few months back. Great bunch of guys, and they played a great show. Toward the end you can even see a couple seconds of me. It was an amazing night; bittersweet, but lots of good memories.

I know enough about many things to know that I don't know anything.

Apparently the cool new way to ask someone out is to not even bother. A guy asked to borrow my phone today, made a couple calls, then texted me later on. He must have called his own number to get mine in his phone. LOL. Gutsy. Lazy, and sorta creepy, but gutsy.

Today I drove the same path we followed on our adventure so many years before. I was reminded of your uncanny ability to have the strangest things happen in your presence; not because you seek them out, nor because they are drawn to you, but because the two cannot seem to exist without each other.

At rare times I find myself tantalizingly close to an intangible truth, that there is something profoundly important about all of this. Usually I'm just numbed by the sheer madness of it all.

Push onward and fight. One step closer every day. Never lose sight of what you want. Live without regrets, laugh much, and love endlessly.

This video gives me a nerdgasm every time. Simply gorgeous, aside from the silly beginning, it was beautifully done (and makes me almost like Auto tune). If you don't know who Carl Sagan is, youtube has some of the old Cosmos episodes that are very worth watching.

Carl Sagan Auto-tuned 'A Glorious Dawn'



The cosmos is full beyond measure of elegant truths
Of exquisite interrelationships of the awesome machinery of nature

After all that we've been through, after all this time
I'm coming home to you.

A recent conversation with a former professor I worked with on environmental engineering projects brought something to my attention. I told him about my current computer situation as a hard-working grad student (two gaming-quality computers running 24/7 sharing a sweet 24" monitor), and I realized that my choices may not be the most environmentally friendly for a student of sustainability.

To help dispel this incorrect assumption, I would like to take a moment to discuss the sustainable lifestyle.

Most of my food is cooked using a microwave (bachelorette food) that is low-wattage (cheapest I could find). Instead of eating greenhouse gas-producing meats such as beef, I make smarter choices (ramen) and never waste food (give leftovers to the cats).

Aside from the computers, my electricity usage is both smart and responsible. By not having TV (too cheap) and keeping lights off when not needed (gamers can see in the dark!), I more than offset any energy used by other technology (er.. we're not including the new power supply, right?).

My commute every day to work is short (found a cheap apartment near the school) and uses little gas (still driving the old honda). I avoid making trips to help conserve gas and produce less pollution (why leave the apartment when I have computers?).

It is my hope that by leading an environmentally-friendly, sustainable life, I can inspire others through my good example.

A very dear friend of mine moved halfway around the world for true love (risqué only because just moving across the country for someone is like, so last year). If all else failed, I figured, at the very least she would be happy. Now she has to move back. It makes me sad for more than just her. It seems like nothing is certain anymore.

Ryan Adams - Go Easy

This is not a happy story.. just a warning.

As I was parking tonight, I saw a stray cat with a strange looking tail. It ran when I came close, but I got enough of a glimpse to realize that most of its tail was gone, and at least 2 inches of bone was sticking out the end.. I figured the poor thing had its tail run over by a car or something.
When I got up to my apartment, there was a letter stuck on the door from the office. It said that the animal hospital has been having a lot of cases of cats being brought in because people have been going around our city hurting cats, and to keep them indoors for safety. Suddenly seeing that poor cat without a tail made sense. Just makes me sick.

A toast to your birthday. Thank you for making me feel like my opinion is important, even though I don't know half as much as you do.

Late night post.. checked my email and saw that grades are already posted for a test I took this afternoon.. WOW is all I have to say, never get grades that fast.. my teacher is awesome. My first test ever for grad school and I got a B+. Considering that's above the average, and my class has some frighteningly smart people in it, I'm very happy. Now I can finally sleep......

It took a lot of courage to say it, thank you for listening. Putting my life back together, bit by bit, I only know that I am lucky to have such great people as friends.

Test-induced post-traumatic stress is best alleviated with the drawing of Nikko cartoons. For those of you who don't know about these or understand them, be thankful.

A great sage sat alone on a hill, deep in meditation. Three visitors came to meet him on three different days hoping to ask him for wisdom.
The first walked right up to him and shook his hand.
The second, seeing that he was meditating and not wanting to disturb him, patiently waited.
The third, seeing that he was meditating, silently sat next to him and began to do the same.

I am the first; I want to be more like the third. Which are you?

My one wish for you would be that you find your way back to your dreams. I won't pretend to know how hard your life has been, but I hope you use that to help others- you can show the world the strength within you by telling your story.
How fitting that the place you call home is known for its tough winters.

Looking forward to the day I can teach you the art of eyeliner. :)

Fall snuck up on me. I miss driving the roads in Texas littered with leaves of gold.
In the desert, with its cacti and palm trees, what defines a fall day is that it is simply cooler than the day before. Today it was a gorgeous 85 with a cool breeze. It was a welcome change and an appropriate day to start anew.

Somehow people think that what they are going through is unique, that their pain is special somehow.

It's not.

Look around you: while the situation may be different, others have gone through their own struggles; thinking yours is somehow more important or more difficult than theirs only isolates yourself. Take strength in knowing you're never alone.

Somehow, amidst the craziness that is life, my brother ended up being one of the coolest people I know. <3 you lil bro.

Apparently blaring Black Sabbath while driving gives even dorky engineer girls like me street cred.

We are friends because, if for no other reason, you share in my complete awe of the intricate beauty of the world around us.



The sky calls to us
And if we do not destroy ourselves
we will one day venture to the stars

Thanks for talking again. It helps to know I'm not the only one.

This summer I read The Hobbit for the first time, and just last night I finished The Fellowship of the Ring. Reading the books makes me appreciate what they were up against when they made the movies. It also reminded me of this very old and very funny gif. Enjoy.

Ninja Wizards

I've never been one for quoting the Bible, but of all the stories we discussed in our Religion classes, one stuck with me- if only because it always confused me. Forgive any misquotes, for it has been a very long time..
The story went something like this: a father had two sons. The older one was always faithful to the father and stayed with him, working for him; the younger one left and wasted all his money living it up, gambling or w/e. The one who left quickly ran out of money and was forced to work really bad jobs to get by. Finally he returned to the father and, humbled, asked for forgiveness. The father welcomed him back and loved him more than the son who had stayed. Annoyed, the older son asked why the father favored the one who abandoned him, when the older one had always been faithful. The father replied: because the one who left came back; he was tested and he returned.

I didn't understand this story for years, until I realized I was looking at it all wrong. It was never about the result; it was about the journey getting there.

One week of worry, two days of stress, and 6 hours of frustrated work, all solved in 10 seconds of clarity.

When things fall into place, life is beautiful.

California will always be my heart, but Texas has worked its way into my soul.
Now, Arizona is my outlook: sunny, with a chance of some killer storms.

I pulled out my colored pencils, all ready to work on the first in a series of studies leading up to the drawing I want to do, and... the charcoal called out to me. This was supposed to be a study of blonde hair, and I ended up spending the least amount of time on the hair itself (actually, I was just starting the shading when the sun dipped below the horizon and my room got dark.. damn sun only staying out until 6pm in AZ.. and have you tried to shade by artifical light? Yeah. It sucks.)... Hopefully more to come.

Finger-food fine dining began our evening ("the best Ethiopian food in town!," you laughed), and sipping tea in the jazz club/art studio turned restaurant while nibbling the exotic flatbread and spices set the mood beautifully. As the dusk rose we walked, through the adorned stone courtyard past crowds gathered around dozens of performers. Music of every kind floated past: haunting pan pipes, joyful chanting in Hebrew, rhythmic, soulful Creole. So many gathered at one stage that we were pressed close in the swaying crowd, our bodies moving with the dancing. We escaped to the quieter halls of the museum and searched the traveling displays for the ancient volumes you seeked ("our own quest," I smiled). Too short it was.
You drove us back from the mountains, the top rolled down with cool air and light jazz floating from your car as you sped up to 90. The wind whipped my hair around as I turned my head back to watch the stars, slowly disappearing behind the fog as we raced through the night. You looked at me and laughed, elated, reckless and carefree, as we shared that moment beneath the stars.

Was checking out at Target today, and the cashier sees me bring up a cat litter box, litter, and a big bag of cat food.

Cashier: *gleefully smiles* "Awwww, you must have a new kitten!"
Me: "No... just have a really fat cat who eats and poops a lot."
Cashier: >.> "Oooookkk......................." *goes quiet*

Hey, there's just more of him to love.

An oldie but goodie, here's for old times Jim. Still brings a smile and a tear. :)

I'm kicking the habit of drawing in class. I zone out and start doodling in my notes, then 10 minutes later I look up to find the professor somewhere in second-order tensor analysis and I don't even know what a tensor is.......

Sometime this weekend I'm going to start some color and texture studies to prep for the drawing I've been wanting to do for years. If any are good enough they will end up on here.

First there were three.

Their path guided by both friendship and love, three companions shunned the world and the rules and created their own of each. They did with three what others could not; attempting new challenges, and each they faced, excited, determined.

Then one found a different path. The three where broken. And, for a time, all was quiet. The remaining two saw others come and go. They found a new place. There they found strangers, at first, and slowly friendship grew.
The time came to make a choice. The friends, once only strangers, stood up for what they believed in.

And then there were five.

Bounded by trust, strengthened by respect, the five walked together, undaunted. What started as a glimmer with the three burned fiercely in the five; no challenge was too great, for their strength came from both within and from each other. They did it first, and they did it best. Word spread of the five, and others looked on in wonder, attempting the same. None came close.

After all this time, the memory of the five still shines brightly.

Released today, one of the first images from the new and improved Hubble. Good stuff.

Something else for lolz and ponderment..
Why 09/09/09 is So Special

"The father asked the son, 'where have you been?'
'Father, I have been to the Land Beyond Escape.'"


His eyes shone with intensity as he spoke of his dream. "I've seen a place, in my mind, that I've never been to, and yet each night I visit."
"There is an old legend I once heard..."
Then he spoke of a place in the desert, and within that place, it was told, is a lost treasure of great value. An old Spanish gold mine is said to still exist somewhere in the mountains. As the legend goes, a prospector found the gold, but took the location to his grave. Now called the lost Dutchman mine, many have ventured into the mountains seeking the prospector's treasure.
"The Superstition Mountains they call that place now," he said, "and I believe that is the place in my dream: the Land Beyond Escape."

"We will go," he said, "to settle my mind," and would speak no more about it.

"So we are treasure hunters now?" I laughed. "How will we succeed where others have failed?"

The same intensity again shone in his eyes. "Because I know where to look."


Scattered maps and countless miles later, we now approached the mountains. Occasionally a turn here, or a building there, was punctuated by a glimmer of a memory from his dreams. A hot, dry summer breeze swept by and whispered as it picked up dust from the landscape; barren, save the occasional Saguaro cactus. These tall and ancient desert inhabitants saw much and told little, silently watching over their desert home. We were just two of many visitors who had passed into their land.
Turning off the road, we sought out the quieter trinket shops and stands. While browsing the pottery and handmade dolls he would casually mention the legend of the mine to the shopkeeper. Usually he received a shrug or a suspicious eye; many tourists had come asking the same, and he was paid no more attention than the rest.

One small shop, as quiet and unassuming as the rest, stood alone with its back to the mountains. Build entirely of wood, it looked to be very old, and inside the air was hot and musty. Bits of colored rocks and large, polished slices of geodes littered the countertops, and the walls were covered with old framed photographs.
In the back, alone, sat a crusty old man with a sweat-stained shirt slowly wiping clean a glass case with a large nugget of gold displayed inside.

"Come for the mine, have you?" he said, responding to the question but not looking up. "I know where it is."

For hours we sat and listened to his stories; he told of the old legend, and all that he had ever heard in his years living by the mountains. Many years had passed since he stopped looking for the mine himself, he said, when the mine found him. He stood and pointed to a framed photograph on the wall above our heads.

"There she is: old Blue Bird." The yellowed photograph showed a group holding shovels and pickaxes, standing in front of a cave in the mountains, with a single wooden sign above their heads reading "Blue Bird Mine." The old Spanish gold, he said, was long since gone. He believed that it and the old Blue Bird mine were one and the same, and that all of its gold had long ago been mined.
"That doesn't keep people from looking," he said with a grin. "And here I am still, years later. Sometimes a place just won't let you go."

As we left the mountains, we stopped at a ranger's station and spoke with the man there. He asked if we had found what we were looking for, and when we smiled and told him yes, he offered us a small packet of Saguaro cactus seeds. We thanked him and began to leave, when he stopped us and said,
"Remember to bring those seeds back to the desert once they have sprouted. The spirits of the cactus have always been here, and they always should be."
My companion promised he would return.



Back home, far from the desert, we planted the seeds, and in our window they sprouted and grew. Years later, he visited the ranger station and returned the desert spirits to their home as he promised. The cacti were planted just outside the station, he told me, with a small sign bearing our names.



Many years have passed. Today, I look out at the same mountains and remember. I call this place home now, just miles from where our little desert spirits are planted. And yet I have not been to see them. I wait.

Perhaps, one day, we will meet again. Perhaps that day we may walk together through the Land Beyond Escape and visit the garden planted in our name.

I'm neither a writer nor a storyteller. Rather, experiences in my life persist in my head until they beg to be told.
This blog serves as a place to relate these experiences as they deserve to be; because, sometimes, the best stories are the ones that are true.