Four years ago I began this blog. Its intention was to trace the story of my adventure moving across the country to Arizona to get my PhD. That time has come and gone.. once again I have trekked across the country, this time in a different direction. The start of a new journey signals the close of another. And so, this will be the last post.

This blog had been taken down for several months since I no longer posted. Today I found myself compelled to read through my stories of yesteryear, to live those experiences again.. and I was not disappointed. For the first time, I finally realize why I kept a blog. It was never to share my stories with others. It was to save them for myself, to remind myself of all the joys and woes which I felt.

Now I reopen these pages, not just for my eyes, but for any who happen to stumble across them. If even one of the posts brings you a glimmer of enjoyment, then it was worth reopening.

I end this blog with words from an earlier post, ones which perfectly summarize the end to my journey. I started the blog with a story: the reason for why I chose Arizona. The reason that called me to the desert. The quest I had undertaken. And so it ends.


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My eyes turned away from the angry sun retreating towards the horizon. A steady, hot breeze swept my hair across my face. Still somewhat unsettled, I cast my gaze around this place which just minutes before had been only a fragment of a distant memory, a memory I chased for nearly 10 years and across a thousand miles. And yet I had found not a whisper of what I had hoped to find.

But what exactly had I hoped for? Meaning? Reassurance? Some kind of connection to all that which I've lost? 

Like so many hopeful treasure hunters before me who had stood before those same mountains, I searched and found nothing. 

And yet, while I feel a crushing weight in my heart, it comes not from the disappointment of walking away from these mountains empty-handed; rather, I instead mourn the coming of the end of my quest. The idea of imagined gold at the end of the rainbow is a far more alluring prospect knowing that the end of the rainbow will never be found. I reached the end of my rainbow, and upon discovering nothing, I regretted for a moment ever undertaking this quest; for the idea of the gold gave me hope, and hope gave me a reason for living. But that regret faded quickly. The pursuit of my imagined treasure led me to a wealth of other riches along the way. And even though this quest ends unsuccessful, I certainly do not walk away empty-handed. 

The Arizona Saga has ended. My eyes turn again to the sun on the horizon, eager for the next chapter in this adventure.